No Sex Tonight?

Got this joke this morning - Brilliant!

No Sex tonight?

I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women
> differ so much.
>
> And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing.
>
> I have never figured out why men think with their head and women
> with their heart.
>
> FOR EXAMPLE
> One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed.
>
> Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says
> "I don't feel like it,I just want you to hold me."
> I said "WHAT????!!! What was that?!"
> So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to
>hear..."You're just not
> in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy
>our physical needs as a man."
>
> She responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just
> love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?"
> Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to
> sleep. The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend
> time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at
>a
>
> big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she
> tried on several different very expensive outfits.
>
> She couldn't decide which one to take so I told her we'll just
> buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so
>I
>
> said lets get a pair for each outfit. We went onto the jewellery
> department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings.
> Let me tell you...she was so excited. She must have thought I was
> one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing
>
> me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know
> how to play tennis.
> I think I threw her for a loop when I said, "That's fine, honey."
> She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the
> excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation she finally
> said, "I think this is all dear, let's go to the cashier." I could
> hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel
>like it."
>
> Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a
> baffled "WHAT???!!!" I then said, "Really honey! I just want
> you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my
> financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your
> shopping needs as a woman." And just when she had this look like she
>was going to kill me, I added,
> "Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy
>you?"
>
> Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either.
>
>
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