Hey Big Boy

Have come to the conclusion that God made Bangkok just for me. He made it all shiny and full of lights in the hope that one day I would come. And here I am.

Bangkok by night is stifling, crowded, noisy, completely overwhelming - and wonderful! Girls, I wish you could see the markets - so pretty! Full of bags, jewellery, shoes - you name it. Sadly, most of the pretty dresses and tops seem to come only in Thai girl size, so until I contract a mild case of disentry and lose a fantasy few stone, they will have to stay on their hangers, winking at me suggestively.

Anyway, so far a lesson has been learnt. Not even 24 hours in the city and already I know we must be harder - there are people on every corner just waiting to take advantage of a naive tourist. Must learn the typical tourist cry of "too much!".

And they love Rocker! Cries of "Hello Big Boy" echo through the streets, today we can't go anywhere without being stopped. They seem so in awe of Rocker's sheer size (he is a Big Boy of the Brick Shithouse Variety) - early this morning he decided it was a great idea to go and get himself a midnight feast of noodles on the Khao San Road, which is literally a two minute wander from the hotel. Imagine his surprise when he was mobbed by a gang of Thai prostitutes.

"Hey you, Big Boy. F**ky f**ky?"

Rocker returned very quickly, with his tail between his legs. My man prefers a nice noodle dinner to a hot night with a Thai hooker while his girlfriend's asleep. Aren't I the lucky one?

I love it here!

Next stop the live ping pong show...

*Kidding*