Rocker - on Thai Prostitutes:

I rose at 2.30am sharp due to ones body clock going out of the window and decided to get something to nibble seeing as i felt rather peckish. I proceeded to try and get out of the hotel lobby when i was asked if i wanted a taxi,ping pong or the floating market. Unfortunately my Thai is a little rusty so i could not point out to the gentleman that 2.30am was a rather odd time to be considering the sights of this far eastern gem. I then managed to get away to a very promising looking noodle stand where i could stuff myself silly with all the fresh noodles and cocker spaniel I could poke a stick at.

This is where everything went spectacularly badly wrong.

Unbeknown to me the noodle stand just happened to be opposite the all night cafe frequented by every prostitute that had missed out on the nightclubs turning out not an hour before. Before i knew what was happening i was surrounded with young Thai girls offering things so lurid that Ron Jeremy would blush. The offers The standard "Me love you time" at the bottom of the scale when i declined they stepped up the tempting offer to a two for one offer involving a ping pong ball again i held my ground until finally i was offered something mind bending involving some sort of animal resembling a goat at this point i fled back to our unspeakable hotel to hide until the sun came up.

tune in tomorrow for the next exciting chapter of Dixon does Bangkok

This is exactly the reason I love Rocker...