Doctor Beat
My doctor said the word 'sh*t' in our consultation yesterday - I was quite taken aback but also humbled, because I always always feel the fear before entering a doctor/dentist/nurse's office - and it put me at ease.
I went in armed with my trusty 'Could You Be Diabetic?' leaflets to throw him from waffling on about my weight - I thought if I mentioned it first it would save him the effort of lecturing me, and save me the feeling of worthlessness at the end of the session.
He checked my BP (perfect, suckas) and when I said "I know I'm overweight, you don't have to say anything", he sort of shrugged and said, "What makes you think that?"
To which I said "Well, erm I know I need to lose at least three stone and I'm the wrong side of 25 now and with a history in the family I want to nip any nastiness in the bud before it's too late..."
He said: "OK, well how do you think you will go about this?"
I said: "Eat less, excercise more?"
He said: "Hmmmm..."
I said: "Yeaaaaaahahahahahh."
He: "Well, do you watch Gillian McKeith?"
I: "Hell yeah, I love her!"
He: "Yeah!"
I: "I don't care if she's not a 'real doctor' - she rocks."
He: "Well, actually I don't think it matters if she's a doctor or not - it's all in the results."
I: (silently mouthing) "I love you."
He: "But she scares the sh*t out of me."
I: (thinking): HE SAID SH*T!!
So we waffled about Gillian for a few minutes, in which we both agreed it was pretty much all down to the excercise and not drinking, or eating the crap fats - which we all know anyway, but I can never resist - and I skipped off happy as a bumblebee into the sunset.
Always trust a man, especially a doctor, who swears. And wears red shoes because he's bored of the usual men's selection in shoe shops.
Yeah.
Ps. By the way, it was a routine check-up for the pill, I have them every six months, so nothing untoward to worry about there, I promise.
6 comments:
Good to know all is well and you have a doctor whose comfortable for you.
Now don't go all nuts about weight okay? You're beautiful just as you are, but healthy is always a good change. Think of it as treating your body better instead of making it smaller.
My doctor sounds just like John Wayne...makes me grin like a goof every time I go visit him. :)
Great to hear everything is aces with you...;)
H - honestly have no fear, it's definitely health, not beauty I'm going for in my old age!
PQ - so lucky - love JW!
Mine talks like a person and not some preachy twit in a white coat. I managed to throw the guy before him for a loop when he asked me "How are we today?" and I answered with "Well I don't know about you Doc, but I feel like a bag of sh!t or I wouldn't be here!"
Your doc sounds ace, she scares the bejesus out of me too! Glad you've got someone a bit human looking after you!
My doctor doesn't know what to do if your problem doesn't involve drinking, smoking, or stress. He seriously asks those three questions and is then stumped and tells me to go away and see if I start feeling better...
A man in red shoes though, I'd need some convincing x
I would love to know what it feels like to be "happy as a bumblebee" cos' I loves me some bumblebees!
Glad you are okay and how come my Dr. only wears boring bowties!
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